Cell Phones and the deterioration of personal space

The first kiss:

As anxious waves of bliss rush over the young couple

They draw closer for this, their very first true show of affection

Nothing could spoil this moment, 

As they draw in closer nerves are shooting up and down their tingling spines

This feeling of excitement preluding that one perfect moment of embrace

Could not be shattered by anything, as it is sacred, 

And the rest of the world seems like nonsense,

Harsh vibrations and the screeching call of sirens shatter the moment

It’s past curfew and parents, too, grow anxious

The sailor:

On his first voyage, following many arduous tasks, 

The sailor finally finds a moment for himself,

As he clambers up to the deck, he begins to see why he is here

The sun begins to show through, as he nears the top of the stairs

Finally, he reaches the climax of his journey,

Atop the many wretched pipes rusted over,

The grueling jobs he’s fought with throughout the day,

He stands, staring out into the horizon,

With the sun gently bathing the many waves in the distance,

He finally realizes, that even after his many disgusting tasks below deck, 

He has this one perfect moment to himself, 

And one missed call

The addict:

Muscles aching from the many self-destructive sins of the night before,

The addict awakens, 

Distraught, the addict begins to question the merit for such disruptive endeavors

The addict begins an attempt at philosophy,

Perhaps, perhaps substances smoked and drank are not all there is to a good life,

Maybe a paradigm shift is in order, 

A new take on life,

A friendly, well known jingle sounds from the addicts pocket,

One new message, from Jim, it reads

“Hey man we scored a few handles, you in?”

The addict is done with philosophy for today

Drugs: like 'em or hate 'em, you're using them

Constantly societal standards tell us the do’s and don’ts of living: “Don’t smoke, you’ll get cancer!”, “Don’t drink, you’ll become an alcoholic!” and, “Whatever you do, don’t do drugs; they’re just plain evil!” The ironic thing is, what society tells us to do, whether it be through television, radio broadcasts, or a close friend, is often what leads people to do these things. A high education, strong work ethic, and just the overall image of today’s go go lifestyle are often what prompt people to do drugs, drink, or smoke. Even if not in the conventional way, more and more people are turning to drugs for the answer. These drugs aren’t bad though, they’re your friends. Anti-depressants, energy drinks, and diet supplements are only a few of these good  drugs. 

Smoking is one thing, it practically guarantees you a one way ticket to cancer, emphysema, or at the very least a horrid cough. But, prozac for instance, has none of these side-effects, right? Wrong, very wrong. These drugs that give us energy, make us feel better, or help us conform to unrealistic societal standards of beauty can be just as bad. For one, everything from an early morning cup of joe to an over-the-counter sleep aid can be very addictive. That’s not to mention the positively mentioned side effects like high blood pressure, stroke, or my personal favorite, sudden death which are mentioned at the end of every commercial for these drugs which help us cope with busy living. 

Whether a man’s depressed because of a bad break up or a woman can’t sleep due to a rigorous work schedule, the answer is just a trip to the drug store away. Just because these drugs don’t come with a surgeon general’s warning or the barista at your local Starbucks doesn’t “card you” before your triple americano doesn’t mean that legal drugs are any safer an alternative. Wearing a suit while downing pain killers doesn’t sanctify an addiction, a vice, a drug, it only masks it. Can you blame the single mom on anti depressants, or the UPS guy on pain meds though? No, of course not, they’re not smoking or drinking.

The list goes on and on. In modern times you can’t even turn on the TV without diagnosing yourself with some ridiculous disorder and paying a huge mark up for some drug. “Do you sometimes feel restless?” drop the TV dinner, that’s you, and you need to be medicated. For the love of god though, don’t turn to Marijuana, only Jamaicans and hobos smoke that stuff. What you need is something from a doctor. God only knows how people handled an 8 hour work day, soccer practice, and still made time for post-grad work before there was a Starbucks on every corner! Oh, wait, they didn’t have to. Before,, people actually only put what they could handle on their plate. 

My point is only this: modern times are stressful, and can drive people to abuse all types of substances, whether they be over the counter or from seven eleven. If i could, i’d make things less stressful, but it seems society’s content with paying off student loans while working all the time and having a baby sitter raise their kids. If that’s how people want to live, fine. But me, i think i actually want some time to enjoy the sunset, pet my cat, or hell, maybe just lie in the grass. But hey, society disagrees, so let’s all down an espresso and get to work. All i ask is that before you judge the loser smoking outside at Starbucks, you take a look in your medicine cabinet.

From Marriage to Hookups

Marriage has got to be one of the touchiest topics today. “Marry me” might as well be “Give up your life” to lots of people. More and more it seems that this is truly the me generation. That is, we only care about number one; ourselves. What does anyone want in life? The answer used to be happiness, but maybe now it’s a masters and a Mercedes. Lots of things now come before relationships; schooling, careers, and egos, to name a few. No longer is sacrifice the cornerstone of a successful relationship, now its good sex. Yes, i fear that love had its turn and now only exists in black and white movies. Especially in the younger age group, all lots of people want is sex and a good facade they call a couple. What is a relationship anymore? There are plenty of kinds; the few serious ones, the friends with benefits, and, my favorite, the hookup. Hookups are like prostitution but without any money exchanged. Two people meet up, screw each other’s brains out, and brag about it to there friends the next day, never to see each other again. From Casa Blanca to American Pie; how far we’ve come. 

The problem with relationships is the aforementioned priority concern. Relationships can be hell on making something of yourself in a world where a bachelor’s degree is the new high school diploma. People have their priorities straight, at least to themselves. An English teacher of mine once told me, en-scotched in her lifetime of wisdom; “Career first, women second” to which i replied with a laugh, only to receive a fierce rebottle. Apparently, love has no meaning at UC, Harvard, or even our high schools, other than in Shakespeare, of course. Sure, you’ll see the occasional cute couple, but the majority of people are nymphomaniacs, or something close to it. Use a person like a porno mag, then throw them away. Hey, now that’s efficient! No baggage, just use protection and you’re on your way to that glorious degree.  

To these people who just want to “fool around” i’d like to ask “How the hell do you think you got here?” Sure, some of us are no doubt the product of a cheap condom, but many of us came from happily married parents. At least, happily married for a time. Divorce rates are so high that a kid with married parents is something odd. What happened? Did people just lose their copies of “Marriage for Dummies”? No matter, with IVF (invetro fertilization), a method for pregnancy by which a woman need not meet a man to carry his child, marriage is no longer a prerequisite to having a family. Yes, happy single moms will be the parents of the future, having baby sitters raise their kids while they go out to hook up. 

Even though relationships have changed, the god news is they come in all flavors now. Yes, no longer is sex only between a man and a woman (damn breeders), now anyone can screw anyone, or anything, they want. See, even though only men and women have the ability to reproduce (for now), which has kept us here for over 2000 years, that’s no longer the only option. Feeling awkward? Misled? Lost? Don’t worry, you’re just queer! Teenagers across the nation rejoice, if ever you shall feel lost, just come out of the closet! Screwing someone in a way that makes no anatomical sense is sure to set you right, clarifying who you are. Let me just ask this; has any teenager ever not felt lost? No. So, why does is follow then, that the answer is to do something that quite frankly still seems unnatural to me (trying to keep it PC here). 

Whew! It’s been a rough ride. Love is now a warm place to screw anything that moves. But hey, at least we’re no longer tethered down by marriage. Hell, if you want to , you can still tie yourself down, you can even do it with a person of the same sex. So, to rap it up, relationships have only been diversified, and absolutely no morality has been lost. What’s not moral about making love in the bathroom? Or with someone you just met? Nothing. My advice to the next generation is to watch out for this marriage and love thing coming back, without all that BS we’re all free to get our BAs and screw, with no strings attached.

"I’m not an elitist, I'm just better than you!"

There is a select group of people, above the rest. They have powers, they do extraordinary things. No, I'm not talking about Heroes, I'm talking about the elite. You may recognize them by there call signs; they always sound condescending, hold there noses high, and speak almost entirely in acronyms. These are the creme of our crop, the best of the best. They go to UCs, Ivy Leagues, and spit on state colleges. Because, after all, a good education has to cost at least twenty grand. Sarcasm aside, these people are the plague of our existence. The only thing more annoying than an idiot is an idiot at Harvard. You may be saying to yourself: “But wait, only smart people go to Harvard!” That’s what i thought, until i went through the college admissions process. So, brace yourselves, you’re about to read a first hand commentary on elitists. Why me? Well, i was one. I go to school at the School of International Studies which is based around an elitist pre-college program (or in international spelling, programme) known as the IBO, or International Baccalaureate Organization. From hence-fourth i will give you but a glimpse of what it is to be an elitist, from their language, their lack of actual common sense, and finally, what they do to be among the elite.  

Do you know what an acronym is? Well, i could bore you with the actual definition (a word formed from the initial letters or groups of letters of words in a set phrase or series of words), but i think i’ll just give you the gist; success. That’s why elitists practically communicate in acronyms. Just look at some of the more famous ones: SAT, ACT, IB, AP, UC,  BA, MA, and , who could forget pHD, the best. See acronyms are like words, only better. This is because they are so important, and used so frequently, that it would just be too much to say the entire phrase. Like doctor of Philosophy, gross... who has the time for that gibberish, pHD sounds so much better. God only knows what SAT stands for, hell, i took it and no one ever told me. Acronyms have vastly become the corner stone of education and scholarly activities. Without acronyms, college would be a lot longer, imagine using master’s degree in common conversation!

Despite how impressive it is to have someone only speak to you in letters, do not be fooled, elitists are not very intelligent, just intellectual. The difference between an elitist and a normal, average citizen is mainly that when asked a question he does not know, the elitist will make an educated (or not) guess and stand by it to the grave, where as your normal person would answer honestly; “I don’t know”. The educated guess the elitist replies with is commonly referred to as BS (and i don’t mean bachelor’s degree of science) and with good reason, as his answer is BS. However, when the elitist stands by his BS answer, the average person is intrigued by his intellectual response, and that, that is what makes an elitist come off as smart. 

If you’re thinking that elitists must be smart because they got into Harvard, oh, think again! I’ll give elitists this much, they work hard to get into college. However, little of this process is actually based on IQ, in fact, a person with any brains wouldn’t go through half the crap you have to wade through to get into an Ivy League College. Applying to UCs or privates entails just about everything up to selling your soul to the devil. Besides the arduous task of applying, there’s also paying for it. Here’s how it goes, the really rich can afford to go to Harvard, and the really poor can get in with financial aid. This is why the middle class is never elitist, they make a moderate some of money which in turn makes them exempt towards affording an education. 

The next time someone replies to a question that just seems out there to you, question there logic. Nine times out of ten, they no less about it than you do, you just have enough self esteem to not need to BS an answer. A teacher of mine once told me that he believes the smartest people are those who admit they don’t know, because there really is a lot that is just plain not known. This is my philosophy on smart people. Elitists are not smart people, their merely the few, the proud, the lucky. Getting into some overpriced university after bending over backwards to apply doesn’t make you smarter, or better, than anyone else. I believe the most intelligent people are the ones who realize when something just isn’t worth it, whether it be getting into Harvard, or saving a fraction of a second by using an asinine acronym.